I married my husband six years ago.
We were university sweet hearts and our families were very close.My husband graduated two years ahead of me but we kept in contact when he went to serve in the North of the country. Although he graduated before me,when I married him he was still a struggling young man,so we practically built up his business together from scratch.He was into importation and I was practically the office clerk/secretary in this teething period. Later on the business blossomed and from this he was able to set up a standard super market for me.
Life was rosy and I was really enjoying my marriage except for the fact that there was no fruit of the womb, but I was not bothered neither was he because we felt we were still trying to establish ourselves-children could come later after all we were working hard to make life easier for the coming kids.
Three years into the marriage,God really blessed my husbands business and we were able to purchase a plot of land in an upscale part of the town-our dreams were coming true and my husband handed over the building of our dream home to me, so I had to hire the builders carpenters and painters – I was fully in charge of the project because my husband trusted me and secondly because he was busy running the business.
The building of this house took a lot of my time and I had no time for my supermarket so I had to employ a female secondary school graduate from the locality where my super market was based to help me run the shop while I handled the building project.
I must tell you that I used to get home late in the night and very tired this was to prevent the workers stealing our materials and my husband was so caring and a perfect husband throughout this time.
I must also mention that when I told my husband about the girl I engaged to run the shop,he was totally against her and said I should have employed a boy because he believed a boy was more trust worthy and would be more serious about the shop,however somehow I convinced him that the girl was from a good family and could do a good job for me.
By the fifth year of marriage,the house project was almost completed and me and my husband began to talk about starting a family for serious-But no matter how we tried I could just not get pregnant,coupled with this was the usual questions from the inlaws on both sides,although this only toook the form of mild advise on both sides.
By the end of the fifth year we had completed the house and moved in but no children. Panic started to set in, and we visited a lot of doctors who assured us that nothing was wrong with either of us.
Meanwhile the girl I employed continued to work in my super market and was very hard working such that I started advising her to attempt JAMB exams but she told me her parents were financially handicapped.
Six years into this marriage, this girl stopped coming to work and I was worried so I visited her house and met her mother.When i enquire about my girl,the mother told me she was sick and that she had been taken to the village.I did not suspect any thing at this point although with hind sight I think I should have suspected something.
Two months later my husbands family members paid us a visit in our home-I thought they were around to complain about my failure to give their son a child but to my greatest surprise they and my husband came to tell me that the girl I employed to help in my supermarket had been put in the family way by my husband and since I had not been able to give him a child they wanted the girl to move into the house I built with my husband as a second wife.
My whole world collapsed.I looked at my husband but he could not look at me,all he did was nod his head in agreement to what his family members were saying.
I went back to my parents to explain the situation but they said I should go back to the house and remain there as the first wife and that they were sure I will conceive if I am patient – but how can I conceive now when I can not bear foe my husband to touch me-I feel so betrayed by him.
I still love my husband but I just feel so angry right now,with him and the whole world.Meanwhile he and his family are in full swing preparing for the wedding to the new wife,my former employee.
Where did I go wrong? Was I not a good wife? Did I not plan with my husband? Is marriage meaningless if there are no fruits-children?
I am so confused and I want women and men to learn from my experience.
My employee and my husband-I feel so bad right now. Could he not bear with me? I know I would have gotten pregnant if he had waited. Now a stranger is going to share my husband with me. Why are people of the world so wicked?
my sister not like dat, but sometimes you might have given a loophole for the girl to come in. never the less see it as your destiny don't allow any body to be telling you man is like this or like dat. it might be dat your destiny is for your husband to have second wife just be patient show love to the girl that she is welcome.if you can do this you will enjoy your marriage and the fruit of womb will surely set in in your womb.
If you are married and you keep saying; I HATE THIS MARRIAGE!".
Is it not married people like you celebrating Marriage Aniversaries?
If you keep on ranting;.
I'M LEAVING MY MAN, HE CHEATS.
ON ME! Please go to town and see all the cute, hot, sexy, hungry and desperate"Ladies".
waiting to
snatch your man's.
money and
property, they don't mind.
sharing. Make it work.
My dearest sister please listing to this God 's sent advise from Adewale Luqman.
sorry dear…life is like dat,,…put your hope and trust in God.
if I hear am.
NEVERtheless I think in my own understanding you are the cause of this probles, but let not go into argument.by your own story I don't think you spend more time with your man, you where better more on the case of your house than your MAN.but he still loves you just stick to ADEDIRAN advice and try to have more time for your home than biz or outside live.